mad.

today i'm mad at the Church.  not proud of it.  but, it feels good to have it out in the open.

maybe it's because i've been cleaning and sorting and organizing this weekend which naturally brings up a lot of memories.  or maybe it is this dreary fall weather.  maybe it's another sunday morning of unfamiliarity.  whatever it is, it is.

the sad part is i know i'm not alone.

one thing i am very, very thankful for is that my God is not the Church.  my God works through the Church, but is not the Church.  and, my God, He loves the Church and chose to accomplish His purposes through this broken vessel filled with His sinner-saint children.  so, i guess if it is good enough for Him, it really should be good enough for me.  but, i'll be honest, today it's not.

oh Holy Father, restore in me a love for your ecclesia, your  body, your fellowship, your Church.  help me to love not only the idea, but the reality of not-yet-fully restored people.  help me to love the bumps and bruises as much as the beauty of it.  and, then, Lord, help me to serve there...loving with abandon.  using my gifts in freedom.  enjoying your children -- who you have redeemed and loved.  oh, Lord, help me to love.     -Amen (let it be so.)

oh Holy Father, restore in us, all of your children, a love for your ecclesia, your  body, your fellowship, your Church.  help us, all of your children, to love not only the idea, but the reality of not-yet-fully restored people.  help us, all of your children, to love the bumps and bruises as much as the beauty of it.  and, then, Lord, help us, all of your children, to serve there...loving with abandon.  using our gifts in freedom.  enjoying each other, your children -- who you have redeemed and loved.  oh, Lord, help us, all of your children, to love.    -Amen (let it be so.)